Tired Old Bastard Blues – A whinge.

Gee I bet that title really reeled you in.

I need a holiday, big time.  Energy levels nearing empty, the Tired Old Bastard gauge is reaching critical.  This was compounded last night during a slightly sad outing for the somewhat-less-than Mighty Lyttelton football team in our last game of the year for the Summer League.  Slightly sad in that our healthy looking squad from the start of the season only managed to turn out 9 players and we required the services of two backpackers who happened to be passing by.

Slightly sad also in that I spent most of my time in the game chasing after younger, fitter, faster guys who I had no hope of catching without resorting to bolas and generally finding the whole experience akin to one of those nightmares where you have to run to or from something and you can’t make your legs move.  This is what happens to you at 35 if you take a fortnight off to recover from the minor whiplash you incurred last time you played.

Remind we why we’re doing this again? I said to myself more than once as I watched the player I was supposed to be marking once again run past me and off into the open pastures of our exposed right flank.  That’s right, it’s meant to be fun.

Football really is a winter game and fun is relative in 28 degree heat on a pitch that’s magically metamorphosed from green grass to something resembling volcanic rock with all sorts of uneven divets, bumps, holes and thanks to the earthquake some actual sand bunkers.  Oh and losing 1-8.

Nothing like all that to make you feel old and tired.

Now the Tyranny of Convenience take on this would be I was out running around in beautiful Hagley Park on a beautiful summer night playing football (the beautiful game) with my beautiful friends, enjoying using my beautiful body and building health and flourishing. blah blah blah.

But sometimes the only thing that makes you feel better is a cold pint at the pub.  Which is where I took our goalkeeper afterwards – he’d had an even worse day at the ‘office’ than me.

For some reason I offered to take home the jerseys as well.  So, loaded as I was with 3 bags and most of the skin of the second toe of my right foot apparently missing, I was really looking forward to the walk to the bus stop and the slog up the hill to follow it all.*

I must say, The Idler is really catching my attention at the moment – I think Tom really is on to something there.  The whole ToC Loving the Effort idea is suddenly looking a bit… well, let’s just say that given the way I’m feeling right now,  a breath of fresh air on the whole subject of convenience might be just the tonic.

“I have often said that the sole cause of man’s unhappiness is that he does not know how to stay quietly in his room.”
– Pascal

* There is a happy ending!  I bumped into one of our neighbours on the bus who’d parked their car at the bus stop and drove me up the hill – how convenient – hooray!


6 thoughts on “Tired Old Bastard Blues – A whinge.

  1. Ahh a cold pint – lovely on a summer evening. It is by the way hard for me to enjoy sport when I am losing. However I take solace from my 4 year old son Ryan as we played 10 pin bowling in town. He got one pin down and threw his arms up in the air in the excitment of getting one pin! He was so happy and we were so happy for him. Wow – may be i could learn to get excited when i can knock one pin down as opposed to being grumpy if i cannot get a strike or a spare! f

    • That’s beautiful, Grant. I hope you then showed him how it’s really done by banging out a strike and then getting down in his face and telling him that you don’t accept failure in your family.

  2. How funny! You need a to go for a jolly good hill run. Then you get to have 3 pints. Come down the pub on Monday if you’re at work – it’s the session Christmas party, a work do for the self employed.

    • I love it! Work-do for the self-employed – aka the ‘Gainfully Idle’. I think I’ll have the 3 pints and then realise what a jolly silly thing the hill run actually is… 😉

  3. No, running is beautiful. In a way it is a total slacker activity because there is NO POINT to it. I ended up exactly where I started and I didn’t do anything while I was out there except sweat, drink water and get in the way of some rural drivers. Oh and I stopped to pat a horse. It’s laziness for people with too much energy.

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